The spiritual path of
Nyoka the Jungle Girl
It has been said that Nyoka was a difficult child.
The same has been said about many children through the ages. She differed from
the other children and she knew it.
About the time we enter 5th grade, we stand
knocking on the door of who we will become. No longer a “little” kid and not
yet a defiant teenager with our finger poised over the bullshit button. Our
teacher for the next few years will be life experiences more than anything
else.
By the time Nyoka entered 5th grade she
had experienced more than most Americans will experience during their entire
life. She was born to an “older” mother, fulfilling her longing of a daughter
since the other children were boys, 13 and 16 years old when she was born.
Her early years were spent moving from one low
class neighborhood to another in Dallas, Texas and she knew little of adult
supervision. At 3 years of age, she would walk across the parking lot of
Holiday Lodge, the hotel converted into apartments, to spend the day in the
pool completely unattended. Looking back she realizes that the other children
didn’t do this. Not even the children of the mother that went bat-shit crazy
one day; chasing everyone at the complex with a butcher knife while trying to
beat down the doors. That incident ended when the police arrived but not before
Nyoka’s nose was pouring blood from being broken in the
chaos.
Before her mother moved her to Florida, she had
witnessed the deepest darkness of the human soul. Shots fired at her during a
robbery, a pistol cocked at her head during another was her “normal” life. The
only thing that really changed in the move was the location and crime rate. She
still did exactly what she wanted.
It’s not that she just didn’t “follow the rules”;
she had no rules placed on her. In
Florida she ran the roads on dirt bikes and went to school if she felt like it.
She had her bullshit button for a while by the time she entered 5th
grade.
All of this back story is to bring us to one small moment in Nyoka’s life that has haunted her since it occurred.
Nyoka’s Story:
I’m not even sure how I did it. Did I throw a ball or
something in the house? Was I swinging the broom like a sword again? I wasn’t
playing with anyone, no one else was there. However it happened. I do know that I did it.
I’m not sure where it came from. A yard sale
maybe? Did someone give it to my mother? Did she find it in a thrift store? It
just appeared one day; hanging above the doorway in the room that used to be
the back porch. It was only there a short time before the incident.
However it happened and wherever it came from
no longer mattered at that point. I had broken the clock and all hell had
broken loose! The clock was the old schoolhouse style and judging by the way my
mother was reacting, it was the most cherished possession in the world. I had
destroyed something that she “could never replace”. In the heat of it, my mouth
shot off, “you can get another. They are all over the place!” When she asked, “Where?”
and I responded “at the school”, her anger only increased.
How long did this go on? I don’t remember. I
don’t remember leaving the room that day. I wasn’t handed down a punishment for
my deed like some 5th graders would have received. My punishment was
in the form of manipulation, guilt and shame of destroying something my mother,
in her words, “could never replace”. My deed was equal to taking one of her
children from her.
We have never talked about the clock again.
It hung over the door in its broken state until the house fire as far as I
know. This clock has come to my mind often through the years. I don’t fully
understand why this memory has haunted me. I have a collection of traumatic
memories but this one has always seemed to be festering right under the skin
and it “could never be replaced”.
Although I had no contact with my mother, the
clock still haunted me. The spirit of the clock would stop in long enough to
make sure I hadn’t forgotten and then would be gone again until the next visit.
I was visited on December 22nd and thought nothing unusual of it. It
wasn’t something I put energy into when I thought of it. The memory would be
there one minute and gone the next.
On Christmas Eve, I knew the stores
would be full of stressed shoppers and closing early but I had agreed to take
my girls to find a straight razor as a gift for their father. I do love that
old stuff and can spend hours connecting to the people of our past through
everyday items. The antique store would be closing in 20 minutes and we were
having trouble finding a razor. Starting to feel the pressure, I had to focus
on our mission. Navigating the maze-like layout, I took a right turn with my
girls close behind.
Did my brain have time to understand
what I was looking at before the tears started flowing? It didn’t seem like it
as I stood in the middle of the antique store, face to face with a clock and sobbing
in front of my children. This was the clock that “could never be replaced”.
Spirit performed a spontaneous Soul Retrieval
on me when I was least expecting it. The part of me that remained locked in
that moment was instantly released. Not only released but returned to me in a
single beautiful instant. I don’t know if my mother remembers the clock
incident or not and the truth of it is I don’t really care either way. If my
mother does remember the clock incident, I’m sure she will swear this clock
looks nothing like the original. All I can say is perception is personal and
some refuse to leave the place of being offended for fear of the unknown. Spirit
is requiring me to send the clock to her and seal the circle for myself. I will
no longer remain in that time. I am not resonating at that frequency that I
held on to for so long. Time is an illusion that we can choose to break. There
is no past or future; there is only this moment that we exist in. The circle is
completion, but sadly some will never close the circle. We can take and use of the
world in any way that we choose but we have no right to be offended when the
world takes and uses of us.
~Nyoka the Jungle Girl
Nyoka has no desire to make amends on the human
level. She is not “reaching out” with the clock. She is only preforming the
alchemy that Spirit requires of her. She has no judgments of the past. These
experiences were all required of her by Spirit or she wouldn’t have lived
through many of them. By not forgiving, we
are held hostage-not the one we can’t forgive.
Our great universe is balance. To be able to
perceive the higher frequencies, we must also perceive the lower realm without
judgment. Great things can be manifested through the lower energies. It’s
alchemy, boys, and girls, and she wouldn’t change a thing in her life.
Shamanism is to heal oneself. That is a lifelong task and you never know when
or where Spirit will decide you have some clearing to do.
Nyoka has figured out that it’s easier to obey
than to try to run from the demands of Spirit. Shamanism is not a religion; it
is a way of life. Anyone can benefit from practicing shamanism. However, some
are required by Spirit to practice. The shaman is a healer that has faced their
own darkness within, and accepted the energies without personal judgments.
Without clearing and soul retrievals, we are
unable to achieve higher states of awareness. We stay “stuck” resonating at the
lower frequency. Most shamanic soul retrievals occur while in a journey trance.
Entering non-ordinary reality allows us to seek out the parts of soul that we have
disconnected from; or we may seek parts on behalf of someone else. As we clear
and achieve higher levels of spiritual awareness, missing soul parts may come
to us without us actively seeking them.
Reunited with the missing parts, we are able to
release the locks on the prison that held that part of us. The emotions that
seemed impossible to let go, now seem almost ridiculous to us when we think
about them. The soul retrieval is nothing short of magical and I do believe in
magic!
WHAT IS SOUL RETRIEVAL AND SOUL LOSS?
Why do we need soul retrieval? When we suffer trauma, crushing
disappointment or severe shock our soul, or a part of it, may leave our body in
order to escape the experience. The result is what psychologists call
dissociation and shamans call soul loss. It is a survival mechanism. If your
soul can’t take any more of the pain it is experiencing it will go away in
order to allow the physical body to survive. The part of you that wants to die,
or may die, leaves and does not come back because it does not want to
experience that same trauma again. When we are missing a part of our soul
we can not only lose energy but our memory, identity, unique skills and life
purpose. This is why we would need a soul retrieval.
